I spent a large proportion of my childhood in Irish pubs in the UK and Ireland, and so spent a lot of time speaking to drunk, but sometimes very wise, adults. As a curious young child I would sit there quizzing them about their lives – where they´d been, what they had done, why they had done it. Always “why” , “why” “why”.
For some reason people have a perception that to ask, “why”, is rude, intrusive, or annoying – when in reality, if the curiosity is genuine, and people are probed, they often love to open up and explain things.The “worst” reaction you can get from asking, “why?”, is that someone says they would rather not talk about that topic.
One thing that has always stood out to me from my chats with friendly drunk, (mainly Irish), adults was the sense of regret about things that they had missed out on or not taken the chance to do.
The overwhelming feedback I got from my conversations was that it is SO important that we take the opportunity to do as much as we possibly can whilst we have no commitments or responsibilities, otherwise we will live our lives regretting not taking the opportunities.
Our years before we choose to settle down and have a family are the years to experiment, explore, take risks and do the crazier things in life that become less accessible and realistic once you have a family. Live life with zero regrets whatsoever. If there is something you want to do find a way to do it without worrying about the consequences. Do not ever life thinking that you cannot do something because of obstacles.
Obstacles are something which are challenges yes but every single possible obstacle has a solution. To live thinking of the past and something you wish you had done but were afraid is stupid. If you need help or guidance in order to achieve your goals then just ask for it.There are always people that will be better equipped to give you the tools that you need to achieve greatness. Self doubt and fear of failure is something that we all have within us but “failure” is just a societal concept that is drilled into us from birth.
Whether you succeed or fail in your pursuit of a goal is irrelevant. If you have failed, but you have given your best then consider that a win. You have put your effort into something and found out that it may not be something that you are good at or particularly interested in but every experience has invaluable knowledge and wisdom that can be learned from to improve your future self and becoming the best version of yourself that you can be.
Life is about success and failure but curiosity should be the thing that we use to leave no stone un-turned. Curiosity is thwarted by fear of the unknown but so long as we have people to guide us and make us feel comfortable then there is literally no barrier whatsoever.
Society teaches us to be narrow minded and think of just what is in front of us. From birth we are taught to follow mainstream education, go to university get a job and become society’s puppet. We are told we HAVE to get married, get a mortgage have kids and continue life in a bubble.
For a lot of people, a stable family and marriage is all that they want and this is fantastic but for a lot of people they feel the pressure from society or family etc and feel they are obligated to rush into this.
Once you make the decision to have children let it be because you are ready to devote yourself 100% to your children and give up your free time and money for 18 years. Do not do it for fear of leaving it too long.