#22 – A Lesson on Non Violent Communication with Yan Patsenko 

Have you ever wondered how everyday people caught in conflict can find common ground? This episode of Quest for Wisdom explores that very question with Yan Patsenko, an artist, language teacher, and a practitioner of Non Violence with a powerful message of peace. 

Yan discusses his latest project, People of Ahimsa, a platform designed to help bridge the gap between Russians and Ukrainians. We discussed the power of open dialogue, shared resources, and nonviolent communication (NVC) to foster understanding. 

Inspired by a desire for a more creative and peaceful environment, Yan recently embarked on a new adventure in Mallorca (Majorca), Spain. Living in a shared space with other creative minds, he’s found a supportive community that fuels his artistic and educational endeavors. Yan’s message is one of hope and encouragement, reminding us of that growth often comes from embracing life’s messiness. 

Today we discuss the true meaning of nonviolence and discuss tactics for living a more peaceful and fulfilling life through nonviolent communication. 

How to find Yan Patsenko: 

PODCAST INFO:

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Topics/Chapters Discussed in this Episode

  1. Guest Intro: Yan Patsenko [00:00:00 – 00:04:55] 
  2. True Meaning of Non-Violence [00:04:56 – 00:10:19] 
  3. Embracing Non-Violence [00:10:20 – 00:15:26] 
  4. The Importance of Understanding Emotions [00:15:26 – 00:22:47] 
  5. Core Concepts of Nonviolent Communication (NVC) [00:22:48 – 00:42:17] 
  6. Activism and Social Responsibility [00:42:18 – 00:45:19] 
  7. Is Violence Ever Justified? [00:45:20 – 00:52:12] 
  8. Game Theory & Conflict Resolution [00:52:12 – 01:08:07] 
  9. The Role of Non-Violence in Society [01:08:08 – 01:24:43] 
  10. Yan’s Artistic Projects and New Initiatives [01:24:44 – 01:49:37] 

Resources Mentioned

Other insightful and inspiring resources mentioned in this podcast episode:

  • (Book) Nonviolent Communication – by Marshall Rosenberg (Author)  
  • (Book) Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead and Win – by Jocko Willink (Author), Leif Babin (Author) 
  • (Book) Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It –  by Chris Voss (Author), Tahl Raz (Author) 
  • Vimala Thakar – Indian social activist and spiritual teacher 
  • John Gretton “Jocko” Willink Jr. – an American author, podcaster, and retired United States Navy officer who served in the Navy SEALs and is a former member of SEAL Team 3 
  • Kazu Haga – The founder of the East Point Peace Academy and is a nonviolence and restorative justice trainer. The author of the book “Healing Resistance: A Radically Different Response to Harm” 
  • Wilfred Edward Salter Owen MC – an English poet and soldier. He was one of the leading poets of the First World War 
  • Game theory – The study of mathematical models of strategic interactions among rational agents. Click here for the video recommendation
  • The Inbetweeners (2008) – Sitcom  
  • In Sickness and in Health – Relationship Podcast with James and Clair Buckley  

Insightful Quotes

  • “Sometimes, the emotions we feel aren’t what we think they are. You might feel angry about something, but it’s not because you’re angry. It’s because you’re upset, or you might feel unappreciated. These emotions can turn into anger.” – Conor Monaghan 
  • “Non-violence isn’t just about not engaging with violence. It’s about being responsive and having social responsibility. It’s about wanting all beings to be well, including those involved in a conflict and those causing harm actively in the context of conflict.” – Yan Patsenko 
  • Your emotions, they are the ambassadors of your needs. Every time you experience a pleasant or unpleasant emotion, it’s an indication that your needs are being met or not being met, respectively.” – Yan Patsenko 
  • “We’re responsible for our own emotions and feelings. Other people can trigger certain emotions within us, but we need to understand that that comes from our own needs” – Yan Patsenko 
  • “Non-Violent Communication (NVC) trains us slowly to take responsibility for our own actions, feelings and needs and then how to communicate that to another person.” – Yan Patsenko 
  • “Violence isn’t just about physical harm. It can also be emotional or mental. You can be violent in all kinds of ways towards another person.” – Yan Patsenko 
  • “We can change things within our control, let’s say our mental and physical health. But there are also systems and structures we are part of. These can impact us and our ability to make free choices. Many people are forced to make unfree choices due to the influence of large structures and systems.” – Yan Patsenko 
  • “It’s really important to understand that nonviolence is a dynamic process that happens within yourself and also within the systems and structures that you are part of. So, it’s not about ignoring that and thinking that you can’t contribute to the harm being done in other places of the world. It’s about recognizing that you can actively engage in the direction that may support other people’s right to live and live in dignity.” – Yan Patsenko 
  • “Sometimes, we confuse peace with comfort. We want things to be comfortable, and we want the status quo to remain as it is. So, we avoid anything uncomfortable. Peace is when there’s a connection, when things flow, and everyone feels respected and honored. That can only happen when we bring these uncomfortable situations to the surface.” – Yan Patsenko 



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I would like to thank the Comedy Clubhouse in Barcelona for allowing us to record here and for their ongoing support. If you are ever in Barcelona make sure to check it out for daily shows of comedy and performance art in English.   

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